Successful Moderation Stories
3 Case of Moderation With Mind Over Alcohol
These 3 case examples represent typical client responses and results of Mind Over Alcohol used for alcohol moderation.
Philp was a 46 -year old sales executive and a graduate of an Ivy League school. He has tried two stints in AA and has been through a traditional Intensive Outpatient Alcoholism Treatment Program. Each time he stayed sober for a few months, but travel for his work and the need to entertain clients led him back to drinking each time. He had brief periods where he could slow down his drinking "if I use enough will power and stop by the 4th drink." But he usually over-shot the mark and drank to 'black out'.
His job wasn't in danger, but his drinking made his home life unhappy for everyone. He wanted to learn moderation, but like most, he didn't really think he could do it. He was, however, a good candidate for moderation, and I was confident he could succeed.
First we worked to consistently reduce his drinking using Mind Over Alcohol. Then we looked for key psychological reasons behind his heavy drinking. What emerged from our work together was his sense of dissatisfaction with where he found himself in life in terms of his career. It wasn't his job per se, his company was a good one, he didn't struggle with the job, and he made excellent money. It was in his own sense that, having graduated from one of the best schools in the country, he 'should be' in a more fulfilling or important kind of job. He felt he had let himself, and esp. his deceased mother, down. She struggled as a single parent to help him get through college.
I helped him see the value he brought to his family's security with his job, and how important and fulfilling that felt. I helped him strategize how to start a non-profit to help single mothers with children find ways to afford better education for their children. Today, he is paying it forward and his drinking continues to be well under control.
Lindsey is talented professional videographer who grew up in a media oriented family, but her lack of self belief was obvious in the rates she charged for her work. Rates well beneath market value. Both her mother and stepfather are highly successful media executives, and she was still financially dependent on them.
Lindsey had tried the Sinclair Method but wasn't succeeding. She didn't find AA's atmosphere and approach appealing to her. So, her physician referred her to me.
Lindsey was drinking 6-9 glasses of wine every night. She was having sleep disturbances and troubling adjusting to her return to the Dallas area and her mother's home. It was familiar pattern for her. She had spent two successful years in Hollywood, working as a camera person and an animator for several well known shows. But, even living far away, she had continued to depend financially on her mother. And when things got tough, her response was to come back again.
Lindsey felt that her mother was overly controlling through out her life and that growing up she had received money instead of love.
The secret to helping Lindsey stay with moderation (in addition to the Mind Over Alcohol techniques) was helping her see that wherever she had gone, it was psychologically more like running away from home. Very emotionally different than really establishing an independent life. Accepting money from her mother as opposed to solving her own problems just kept the loop being repeated and her self esteem even more diminished. And it would forever keep her from understanding the difference between love and money no matter the depth of real feelings.
Facing these things, Lindsey found an affordable apartment of her own and stopped taking any money from her parents even when things got tight in her now self-employed situation.
Today, Lindsey's self esteem and self belief are much better. She has raised the rates she charges for her work and standing on her own two feet as a full adult. Her drinking has become rare and well within safe limits.
Jeff was a 40 year old bank executive at the time he underwent Mind Over Alcohol. A true man for all seasons, he had fought in professional MMA circuits in his 20's, bought season tickets to the symphony each year, and was very active in his church groups. He had been divorced a year before Mind Over Alcohol, after 12 years of a childless marriage.
His drinking had always been too frequent and too much but had escalated even more since the divorce. Despite feeling his marriage was truly over, he had declined dating. This seemed unusual, given his man's man affect and genuinely handsome looks. He had frequent offers from women. And Jeff is entirely Heterosexual in his orientation.
We were well into his Mind Over Alcohol training, which was otherwise going well, when the cause of his basic unhappiness finally emerged. Jeff had a condition that caused sex to be awkward and usually painful for his partners. He had felt deeply embarrassed about it for 25 years. But with the build up of rapport between us, and the effect Mind Over Alcohol has on reducing threat sensitivity, helped him finally able to discuss it with someone.
I helped him to understand that no matter how rich and varied his lifestyle was, it could never compensate for the sense of inadequacy he felt in his ability to function as a man and it was time to take action. Once he began looking for answers, he discovered that there was a simple, effective and non-surgical way to correct his difficulty.
Today, Jeff and his wife are back together. There romantic and sexual life is very good. They bought a new home, as a part of their new start, with 3 extra bedrooms. As Jeff told me, with a sheepish grin on his face, "I'm making for lost time."
Jeff's drinking is now mild, occasional, enjoyable, and is done in the right settings and right times.